Transition and Redirection
By: Lovely del Mundo
It has been half of the year 2015 already. I feel so blessed because everything that was taken away from me 3 years ago is all coming back to me now. It’s like a second life. My faith. My sanity. My career. My social life. My soul. Most of all, being who I am. It’s being the real Lovely del Mundo.
I am dealing with Mid-20’s crisis. It’s the time where I am thinking about my path or where should I go next. This is the phase that I still have uncertainties about my life status and my relationship with the people around me. I am concerned about my satisfaction for what I am doing. Also, I want to strengthen my faith with the higher power, God.
I am having a hard time from the transition of having a busy lifestyle then being super Idle-ish life then busy lifestyle again cycle. I can’t blame myself if I am not good enough with the job I am doing right now. I know the reason behind it which other people don’t know. And, will NEVER UNDERSTAND. Conceal. Don’t feel. Don’t let them know. Judge me. I don’t care. I just came back. It just so happen that destiny leads me there. Everything falls into place when I am in the field of TEACHING. I want to talk about it in this blog.
Teaching is not just a job but also a vocation and service. It needs a thousand…ah no… million of patience, hard work and passion to last long in this kind of career. Now, I am starting to assess myself. Am I really for teaching? Why I am here? Teaching is my second option as a career. I can’t say that I don’t like it. I have plans to become a college professor. I enjoyed teaching ESL. There’s a rewarding feeling in teaching that I won’t feel with a call center job. I still pursued Communication / Journalism major way back on college because that is what I want to do. I prefer to work in a publishing office or something about advertising. In my family tree, almost all of my aunts are teachers already so I want to be different. Oh no! I failed! Even though, I escaped taking BS Education as a major still I am working now as a teacher. I told my mom, “I can’t escape the genes trail”.
I suddenly remembered the day I was interviewed with the job I have right now. The principal asked me if I am willing now to have a redirection about my career. My answer was, “I am willing to learn this new job.” Did I say yes? I don’t think so. I still want to experience my career preference but destiny doesn’t lead me there. Do you create your destiny or destiny is arranged already? Well, I have NO CHOICE. I need a full-time job. I need to be a legal and productive citizen of the Philippines. Blogging doesn’t offer me a decent salary nor a legal financial security. I have to decide wisely. Grab the opportunities in front of you right away. I am already 24. I want to have a stable career. I want to recover into the best person that I can be. I want to prove with all those the people who misjudged me, belittled me, betrayed me and even labelled me as “loser” when I was still under the control of that monster that they are all wrong. Thanks to that experience because their bullshits were all revealed to me. Now, I know who’s real or reel.
Let’s go back with my teaching career. Now, I am working as an asst. teacher in Casa (Pre-school). It’s a Catholic and Montessori School so I really don’t express myself too loud there. I can’t be a rockstar. I don’t do my dramatic eyeliner. Haha! In a class of 16 preschoolers, I need to attend their needs every day for 3 hours. I need to keep an eye in every each of them for their safety. Being a pre-school teacher is a very tedious job. Actually, I never imagined myself to be one but I am actually living it now. It never crossed my mind. I used to teach Koreans but the youngest was a Grade 3 student.
I can relate with the creative theorist blog here:(https://wanderatease.wordpress.com/2015/06/04/teaching-abroad-honestly/)
“Kids are fun to hang with, but hard to teach. I’d rather deal with moody middle and high school students than high energy kids.”
He also mentioned about the trapped routine and there’s no room for exploration. I feel the same way about it. In my age, I want to explore more and live life to the fullest now that I still I have the energy to do it like my college batch mates and high school close friends. I am still thirsty for an adventure which I won’t get in a school setting. My mom doesn’t understand that what I am saying, I guess. Regarding my workplace, there are turtles in aquarium, 3 cows namely Alba, Rosie and Bianca and surprising anonymous snakes. Maybe, I can blog about the place and take pictures just in case you are wondering why it’s like I am in National Geographic. Haha! Sometimes, I am just stressed out because I am the only one new and the rest of the people are almost together for a year so I can’t relate to them most of the time plus age gap. If I only have a new employee buddy that would be better. I really hope so. There are times I felt discriminated esp. when my mom wasn’t allowed to fetch me in the lobby while my other colleague’s husband can. Why it has to be me? It’s because I am the only new one. Did I forget to mention I am the youngest one as well? Looking in brighter side, the best part of being a pre-school teacher is the students are still cute and pure. They can easily smile and laugh again after they cry. Their presence is somehow stress relieving. Hi Gent! ❤ There is free lunch everyday. I love the recipes of the cook there.. 😀 haha.. (Giniling na may corn, peas and carrot) I have no transportation fee because I just live 5 minutes away from the school. I just walk.
I asked myself several times already. Am I now having a redirection in terms of my career? I already decided to take up CTP (18 units) course. I am having fun with my Saturday class. I love my come back to DLSU-D. I miss my green university. ❤ After that, I’m preparing myself for the Licensure Exam next year 2016. I already finalize my further plans too about this career. I always pray to God for the blessing with my plans and guidance. (My meditation hour is 4:00 AM.. That’s one of my secrets) My heart and mind was settled. ^^
As being a blogger, I still blog. That won’t stop. If I will be given a chance to be an editor / writer, I will accept that. I will be consistent and persistent being a writer. I have better plans with Words and Rhythm. Also, I want to thank some people who influenced, encouraged and supported me during my part-time days as a blogger. You know who you are. I was inspired and motivated to live life. I love my blog community.
Thanks for reading! ^^ Any violent reactions dear readers? hahaha! :p